Patience of a saint
My elder son is three and a half, and he knows all there is to know about the world.
On the one hand, I am always pleased that we get comments like “isn’t he polite” when we go shopping and he says thank you without prompting, but on the other hand, he’s testing me and my wife to the limit at the moment.
What makes this worse is his younger brother (18 months) idolises him, has now got “NO!” down pat and seeks to mimic his idol at every opportunity. My elder son has figured this out and knows that one sure fire way to raise my blood-pressure is to set his brother off on a behaviour pattern that irritates me (such as blowing spit over my breakfast)
I got home from work this evening (after an excellent day locking horns with another disruptive child – this one in his mid-twenties) to discover my wife and my elder son at loggerheads. In the short journey home – she picks me up each evening as we’re temporarily down to one car – the voices were raised and the tone was decided fraught.
I recognise this… I get like it sometimes, and it’s all very well Dr Tanya Briar and that Essex “your behaviour is unassseptable” Super Nanny showing us how to be good parents, but seriously... who can do that 24-7-365? – Not me.
Having said that I was determined not to continue the pattern once we got home - luckily my wife went straight off to the gym which removed one pressure point, so now all I had to do was persuade the other one to calm down.
It seems my son wants attention and will do anything to get it, he’ll take anger and shouting as that’s better than being ignored.
It took an hour of smiling and patience, and ignoring the banging of doors and throwing of toys, studiously keeping the younger occupied so he wouldn’t follow his idol, and thereby not giving the elder the one thing he wanted, my attention. It worked, and on top of the day I’ve had, I’m ready to give myself a big pat on the back. Getting him to modify his behaviour is easy, after all he’s not even four yet, and he can only keep it up for an hour before he realises it’s futile. My wife, however, can sulk for days.
The final trick was getting them to bed before mum came home. They ALL need to sleep it off.
On the one hand, I am always pleased that we get comments like “isn’t he polite” when we go shopping and he says thank you without prompting, but on the other hand, he’s testing me and my wife to the limit at the moment.
What makes this worse is his younger brother (18 months) idolises him, has now got “NO!” down pat and seeks to mimic his idol at every opportunity. My elder son has figured this out and knows that one sure fire way to raise my blood-pressure is to set his brother off on a behaviour pattern that irritates me (such as blowing spit over my breakfast)
I got home from work this evening (after an excellent day locking horns with another disruptive child – this one in his mid-twenties) to discover my wife and my elder son at loggerheads. In the short journey home – she picks me up each evening as we’re temporarily down to one car – the voices were raised and the tone was decided fraught.
I recognise this… I get like it sometimes, and it’s all very well Dr Tanya Briar and that Essex “your behaviour is unassseptable” Super Nanny showing us how to be good parents, but seriously... who can do that 24-7-365? – Not me.
Having said that I was determined not to continue the pattern once we got home - luckily my wife went straight off to the gym which removed one pressure point, so now all I had to do was persuade the other one to calm down.
It seems my son wants attention and will do anything to get it, he’ll take anger and shouting as that’s better than being ignored.
It took an hour of smiling and patience, and ignoring the banging of doors and throwing of toys, studiously keeping the younger occupied so he wouldn’t follow his idol, and thereby not giving the elder the one thing he wanted, my attention. It worked, and on top of the day I’ve had, I’m ready to give myself a big pat on the back. Getting him to modify his behaviour is easy, after all he’s not even four yet, and he can only keep it up for an hour before he realises it’s futile. My wife, however, can sulk for days.
The final trick was getting them to bed before mum came home. They ALL need to sleep it off.
posted by Furry at 10:18 pm
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home